It must be a female thing. Yeah, yeah.

Further to my 11 August Farmdoc’s Blog post [1], I’m now the proud owner of a Survival Ark grain mill. I collected it from the Mole Creek Post Office nine days ago. And seven days ago I bought a few kilograms of organic wheat. But I haven’t yet ground any. I duly unpacked the mill, attached the table clamp and installed the grinding stones. As the stones are grooved obliquely, it occurred to me that the handle should only be turned one way, i.e. clockwise or anticlockwise. The instructions didn’t say which, so last Friday I emailed the supplier (who’s also the designer) to ask him. Last Monday he emailed me back as follows: ‘Yes, it does make a difference. Clockwise when turning the handle from the rear of the mill. If someone is watching from the front, the flour falling from the stone from their view, it would be turning anticlockwise’. Blimey, I was even more confused. So I emailed Sweetheart Vivienne thus: ‘Am I visuospatially challenged or is he linguistically challenged? Can you understand what he’s trying to tell me?’ To which she replied ‘I understand. You turn the handle in a clockwise direction. It must be a female thing’. So now I know. And tomorrow I’ll no longer be a wheatgrinding virgin (or a virginal wheatgrinder). ‘It must be a female thing.’ Yeah, yeah. Just to prove how clever men are, take a look at this 19-item slideshow [2]. I rest my case.