It must be a female thing. Yeah, yeah.

Further to my 11 August Farmdoc’s Blog post [1], I’m now the proud owner of a Survival Ark grain mill. I collected it from the Mole Creek Post Office nine days ago. And seven days ago I bought a few kilograms of organic wheat. But I haven’t yet ground any. I duly unpacked the mill, attached the table clamp and installed the grinding stones. As the stones are grooved obliquely, it occurred to me that the handle should only be turned one way, i.e. clockwise or anticlockwise. The instructions didn’t say which, so last Friday I emailed the supplier (who’s also the designer) to ask him. Last Monday he emailed me back as follows: ‘Yes, it does make a difference. Clockwise when turning the handle from the rear of the mill. If someone is watching from the front, the flour falling from the stone from their view, it would be turning anticlockwise’. Blimey, I was even more confused. So I emailed Sweetheart Vivienne thus: ‘Am I visuospatially challenged or is he linguistically challenged? Can you understand what he’s trying to tell me?’ To which she replied ‘I understand. You turn the handle in a clockwise direction. It must be a female thing’. So now I know. And tomorrow I’ll no longer be a wheatgrinding virgin (or a virginal wheatgrinder). ‘It must be a female thing.’ Yeah, yeah. Just to prove how clever men are, take a look at this 19-item slideshow [2]. I rest my case.

Survival Ark - coming over the horizon

Last 18 May I wrote I was looking to buy a hand-operated flour mill – to grind wheat into flour for 100% wholemeal bread [1]. Now, 12 weeks later, I still haven’t bought one. But I will soon. Last Monday Sweetheart Vivienne and I went to the health food store in Deloraine to buy flour and yeast. Whilst there I asked about flour mills. The proprietor showed us one. It looked okay, and it was a good price. But I had misgivings. Free floating ones. Gut feelings. When I asked about the warranty, he said he’d have to check. I took that as a way to temporise. I said I’d be back in two days. Yesterday I made some internet and phone inquiries. I’ve found a better one: more functional design, improved grinding capacity, made in Victoria, lifetime guarantee. It’s about A$90 dearer. But the advantages justify the higher price. So later today I need to tell the Deloraine man I’m not buying the mill he’s selling. That’s too hard for me to do. I don’t know why, but it is. A result of one of my many long-term psychological glitches. So Sweetheart Vivienne’s doing it. She’s much more psychologically able than I. Also we’re returning a 20kg bag of baker’s flour we bought on Monday – as we’ll need less once we grind our own flour. So all going well, some time next week we’ll be proud owners of a Survival Ark (pictured). Oh what fun. Stay tuned.