farmdoc's blog post number 30

She calls me ‘poo head’, ‘poo face’ or ‘poo bum’. But I don’t mind, because these are salutations of endearment. Jarrah, or Jazzy as she is mostly called – the second of Vivienne and farmdoc’s three beautiful granddaughters – is aged four, and currently resolutely faecal in orientation. Her mother Kate says it’s just a stage. Maybe, but I’m many times older, and I’m with Jazzy, all the way. Consider wombat poo (pictured): Though I can’t I fathom how wombats produce cube shaped poo, in the three weeks since Kai Kai and I met, her poo has been cubic and firm, so I know our relationship has not stressed her. And because wombats are fastidiously clean, daily I collect her poo, place it in a galvanised bin, and add water producing a rich manure tea that fertilises our vegetables, fruit and berries. The copious poo from our sheep and goats improves our paddock soil and therefore the quality of their pasture. Incidentally, because goats’ stomach juices inactivate seeds, goat poo is weed seed free. Amazing. Regarding human poo, I am keenly interested in the frequency, quantity and consistency of mine, and also whether it floats (good) or sinks (less good). So in future, whenever Jazzy calls me a noun preceded by ‘poo’, I will smile, think how perspicacious she is for one so young, and kiss her tenderly.